Inner Journey

Inner Journey

All journeys require preparation. The inner journey is no exception to that rule but because we actually don’t think of the inner journey in the same way we think of a vacation, for obvious reasons, the idea of preparations strikes us as preposterous. Of course it does. But let’s look at this from a different perspective, the monastic life.

Granted, the monastic life is foreign territory for most of us, but is it really that foreign? Anyone who is interested in deepening their understanding of their personal spiritual life is wading in essentially monastic waters. Eventually we will find our self reading sacred literature, maybe out of curiosity or maybe for more significant reasons. But it is the ways, teachings and inner world topics of mainly the Christian and Buddhist monasteries of the world have penetrated mainstream society.

One of the given practices within traditional monasteries is to seek the guidance of a spiritual director as we prepare for our inner journey. Why? Think of it from this perspective. Imagine your inner Self as unknown territory. You do not really know who you are from the inside out. You know who you are from the outside in. You know the outer reactive you, but not the inner proactive you. You know the frightened you far better than the courageous you. You know the part of you who clings to the world as you want it to be far better than the inner you, who understands that the world is in constant flux and that you must learn to flow with the change and flux that is the nature of life. Learning to let go, not once, but again and again, is the path of learning to live in harmony with the laws and ways of life instead of living in opposition to life.

Love Is the Only Currency of Life

The inner Self is a truth-seeker. The outer us is driven by the personal illusions we all create for ourselves, foe illusions we will do anything to maintain them. The outer you fears looking at the truth whereas the inner us cannot rest until it sees the truth. The outer us holds selfishly to love, using it as reward and punishment currency. The inner Self recognizes love as the only currency of life. Our outer and inner worlds, our external and interior domains, are two separate spheres of consciousness, that of the ego and the soul. Our outer self, our finite self, exists in the illusion that somehow the accumulation of material objects - money, status, fame, power, will assure its longevity.

The ego tells itself that the laws governing "the finite" will yield in the face of enough piles of stuff.

Moguls of power have attempted to negotiate with the "finite self" since the beginning of time, only to be met with defeat, always defeat. Imagine that between the domains of the ego our external self and our interior self, is a second ever-beating heart that pulsates the eternal paradox: an endless attraction for this physical life is ultimately met with endless frustration or disappointment.

We can never finally achieve ultimate control over everyone or everything. Someone will always escape our manipulative tactics. We never really find what we are looking for, is it love? And how much love would that be? And where will we find the supply source for all this love and attention we crave? Is it really another person? But what if that person leaves us? Then what? Will the search begin again? Well, maybe it’s not another person. Perhaps it’s stuff. How much, then, and where do I get stuff? How much is enough? And then comes the dilemma: Where do I put all my stuff? Stuff needs storage.

The spiritual journey is the path of entering into the eternal paradox that exists between our ego and our soul, that center point at which our appetite for the finite confronts our longing for the part of us that is capable of comprehending the nature of the infinite. Through that comprehension, we experience our own infinite Self. Our fear is that if we touch our infinite Self for even a second, our appetite for our finite world will evaporate.

When we return to our mundane consciousness, our ordinary five-sensory world, we will see it for what it is: illusions built upon temporary illusions. Then how will we now exist in a world that we so clearly understand to be driven by fear?

So the question is this: How does one prepare for a journey to overcome personal insecurities?

The Beginning

People often say that their spiritual journey began as a result of an illness or a trauma. It was, in other words, crisis-motivated. Pain, loss, isolation, and/or the need for personal healing drove the individual to seek out a path of personal healing, comfort, or self-empowerment. But ask that individual, "What are you actually seeking?" Most often, that individual will give a vague one-word reply: happiness, health, peace, tranquility, and joy are very common answers. None of them actually "means" anything. They are not really arrows pointing in any specific direction. They are just words that float in the air, leaving the person uncommitted to any path of spiritual discipline or devotion whatsoever. What type of spiritual discipline and daily practice is actually required to achieve joy, or happiness? In general, happiness is associated with other people and more often than not, a person assumes all those other people are responsible for making his or her happiness happen.

I was intrigued for a long time at the consistency of these vague answers. At first I could not figure out how people could say, they were seeking something yet have no idea what that something was. I realized then that we are all in search of something, even though we don’t know what it is. Eventually many step into spiritual waters, looking for a way to heal their sorrow. Gradually one realizes that all knowledge of the Self and that of the Universe are found within oneself. It is the journey home to our true nature, our oneness with the All.